Movie Scoop- Temptation, Tyler Perry

*covers face, dusting and coughing as i walk in. As always i'm pretty late with my posts again, yeah yeah, i know and i sincerely apologize. Work have been so demanding and challenging, thanking God anyway.

Hope you guys are fine and good sha, as for me, i've been great could be better though. Been taking my time to gather my thoughts and bring you an interesting topic *like i always do lols.

Ok, Tyler Perry's movies have always been the best movies i don't want to miss. So, some weeks ago, i got to watch Tyler Perry's Temptation- Confession of the marriage counselor *finally.

 

It was like a dream come through, seriously i'm not exaggerating. The point been that i've tried all i could but i never got to see it when it was showing at the cinemas. Anyway, i got to see it finally from a friend's dubbed copy. The movie is quiet packed with interesting, intriguing and compelling details i must say. The story line is so simple anyone can relate with it.

.

I wouldn't want to bore you with the details of the movie so i suggest you watch it too. As for me, after taking time to watch and *digest the movie, mind you, i'm not trying to act like a marriage counselor here but the following are my conclusions;

1. Love is a Big decision- it should not be decided on Emotions alone
2. To be together forever (In Marriage) it takes two mature minds in agreement
3. Marriage at whatever stage should not be boring.
4. Marriage should not end *Dating and chasing... if you know what i mean
5. Partners should know each others expectation before marraige
6. Be truthful all the way- before and in marriage
7. Make out time to talk
8. Your partner should be your best friend
9. Whether in a marriage or committed relationship, it's important to keep dates of major occurrences and anniversaries in each other's lives.
10. Showing care and concern shouldn't stop at giving gifts and doing something special; it should be firmly rooted in asking questions when something unusual is noticed
11. Never assume rather be sure or simply ask
12. Create room for change- Change is constant and human is dynamic
13. Be ready to compromise
14. Marriage is worth waiting for
15. Above all choose God first before you choose your Life Partner

If you've watched the movie, i wouldn't want to take sides but i would blame Brice and Judith for immaturely taking their marriage for granted. Like i said earlier, i'm not trying to act any marriage counselor ( i'm not even married, yet!) but these are just my thoughts after watching the movie.
It will be nice and i suggest  you watch the movie, if you haven't. It'll also be nice to hear or rather read your opinions and thoughts after.

 Lets help each other. "Every marriage is worth salvaging" and "Every marriage should be a blessing".

See your comments soon... Cheers!

Olufunke

Maami- Special Dedication

Yeah yeah i know, some of you would have seen on my blackberry Display pictures (DP) referring to the most amazing woman on earth, Maami (My mother). Oh! lest i forget, thanks for liking my last post. Got a lot of positive feedbacks, really felt encouraged and appreciated *takes bow (i actually feel like celeb in the spotlight, lols).

Anyway it was Maami's birthday two Sundays ago yayyyy, it was one of the best days with her. I'm usually not good with keeping dates *covers face, gosh i'm so bad at it(Dupe my friend can testify). But God is just so faithful this year, my sister never forgets so she kept ringing it in my ears and asking what we were going to get her this year.

Wasn't really planning anything for her not until i got home from work on Friday night. Immediately i remembered it was her birthday, i quickly started my plans. Ok before all my planning and what i did, lemme quickly share why i tried to put up a special day for her.  Oya, story story......Story!

Long long time ago (lols), when i was younger sha, i never used to appreciate my mum (though i've always loved her). Infact, i used to wonder where she came from maybe she's from another earth apart from this one where in (abeg nobody should tell her this ooo lol). She is not like every other mother i know, like seriously and honestly! She was just so different, she had sooooo many rules and regulations we must "strictly" adhere to. For example,
1.You must say "thank you Ma" after every flogging, to her its a sign of appreciation for her Love (Imagine, flogging is loving, lols).
 2. She always ring in our ears that, "you are not like everyone and so you're not allowed to do what everyone else can do" Chai. For example, when my mates are running around and having fun in the rain, trust me i'm inside the house sipping hot tea  lools. Its soo funny when i remember those days now. Ok lemme share these few, usually i'm not allowed to drink "soaked garri" cos of my sight and even if she allows me to drink it, there's a measured quantity of sugar to drink it with. So this particular day, she went to somewhere and quickly took the advantage to drink garri before she returns. So i quickly got a cup and poured the amount of garri i can quickly finish in it but unfortunately for me, i saw a tied black nylon bag on the kitchen table thinking it was sugar, i poured enough "sugar" into my garri (trust me that enough was a lot). Poured water and as i took the first sip, she came in OMG! and as if that's not enough the assumed sugar was actually Salt.  Trust me, i drank it like that ooo. Cos how do i explain that i'm drinking garri talk less of trying to pour it away as soon as she comes in cos it as salt instead of sugar(I'm so sure i would say another thank you if i ever do that lols). Hmm...Yours Truly, I drank it calmly and quietly lols. She looked away and that ends that page *sighs. Looking back i had a lot of experience i would want to share but space wouldn't permit.

Now years later, i appreciate every cane, every "Bilala/Koboko" (if you know what i mean), every scold, every "you can't wear makeup now", every "go and read your book, every "you're beautifully and wonderfully made" encouragement, i appreciate every minute and second she has been a mother, a friend and a confidant. I think i'm free to say "her cane shaped me to stardom" *tears of joy
She saw what no-one else can see in all her children, she taught the ways of Christ (i'm eternally grateful), She never spared the rod to teach us lasting Morals,  Her love for all us is an example of how Christ Loves, every meal is always memorable (i missed it like desert miss water when in Uni), Her kind words uplifts me, Her prayers even for those she has never met are enduring, She is a role model, she is a mentor, She is blessed with a big heart, she's a Gem, she's a daughter of the Almighty, She's my father's best, She's her children's Angel, She's my best friend, She is our mother, She's Maami.

Long story short, she had a great day on Birthday i must say and i feel so blessed!

Be your own Celeb- Conclusion

Hi guys, how has the week been so far, mine has just been  there nothing exciting maybe that's why i've not been so motivated to post, sorry about that. Who missed me... miss you guys though *battling lashes

Anyway, hope my last post was helpful in someways. Here's the concluding part to "be your own celeb", so here we go; after taking a look at the package(the outlook, they fashion style), its also important to make sure that the container is also of great and enviable standard(the inner beauty that stands one out).

The point i'm trying to make is that, its enough to wear the good clothing and have the right outlook but its also very important to have the right self esteem to carry the outward beauty.
Lemme refer to a part from my previous post http://olufunkesway.blogspot.com/2013/07/be-friend-to-have-friend-part2.html for instance, many young people try to be accepted by their peers(which i think is ok) but most time, being accepted wouldn't or doesn't really portray Our true Identity. I had a friend one time, he is very intelligent and down to earth from a humble home but he would rather hang out with the "cool and happening guys" in school than be his real humble self. He tried sooo hard to be accepted that he ended up worse than the rest of his gang.

For me,these are what one must put in check to stand out(Please Note, these are just my opinions);

1. First and foremost understand that "being your own celeb" shouldn't make you Rebellious(and i mean that in a bad way- you might not be among the crowd but that doesn't mean you don't care about what's happening in the crowd *that might look sad and crazy.

A rebel

2. Find and recognize where your interest lies- this in-turn means one should try out new things, explore and be adventurous (though safety and integrity must be in check). This enables you to find out where your interest lies, what you like and what you don't want. Fore instance, I've had friends who were extreme Tomboys before but are now very Ladylike(I'm sure they changed their mind after lipstick trial, lol). Don't be a bandwagon find what interest you! Go to new places, taste new food, play a different sport, try something new.

3. Mistakes are good! (sometimes)- On this one, i think i come first. I've made several mistakes one way or the other (you don't wanna know) but the point is, i don't remain in my mistakes rather i learn from them. I believe every mistake is a learning curve. Some mistakes are very costly though, so be careful of the kind of mistakes you make ooo lols.

4. Set out to achieve something- I use to tell people that "fulfillment does not come by buying all the riches in the world but by making yourself better for the positive purpose of other people"*feeling like Mandela lols. Set out to achieve different goals no matter how small, their achievement brings fulfillment. (Please make your goals reasonable)

5.Tell yourself the truth- This is one big bridge i had to cross, i had to learn to admit the truth to myself at all time. Telling yourself the truth means you are still in contact with your conscience and the innocence within. It also puts you in check when you're trailing off track.

6.Appreciate and Celebrate yourself- Part of appreciating yourself is being where you're appreciated rather than where you're tolerated. Another thing is, celebrating your little successes and achievements. Feel free to laugh and dance at yourself for yourself. "if you don't take care of yourself, who will?" Go out on lone dates, buy new things for yourself, don't wait for anyone to feel celebrated and appreciated.

7. Do the Mirror test- this i learnt from my bestie, he put up a mirror in front of me one day and asked me to look at myself. I was shy at first cos i was trying to adjust myself but he said again "look through the mirror", i couldn't. Guess what! i went home and i looked at myself (thank God i have a full stand mirror in my room) i looked through to see myself.  It was funny and very dumb at first but after a long time of trying, i could see The most beautiful woman God created (blushing). I'm not saying i'm perfect but the mirror test enables you to see you like you should, Beautiful!

I'm sure i've been saying a lot since, but these are my thoughts and they've helped me. Hope they help you too. Once again. feel free to share your thoughts and point of view. Every comment and view is appreciated.

Till another post.... See yaa and feel Fabulous this weekend. Muahhhh....
Olufunke

Be your own Celeb- continues

Hello My Celebrities,

Its Friday... yeah i know! "TGIF things" *don't mind me* First of all.... *you know the rest, lols, thank you for reading my posts and i really do appreciate your comments.

Ok, like i said in my last post for one reason or the other, everyone deserves to be celebrated and recognized. Hence why everyone to me is a "Celeb. Being your own Celeb is not copying another person's way of life or style, its all about being the best of You *simple. The people tagged as celebrities as defined by oxford dictionary are people who have done exceptionally well in being Themselves. One thing that i found out recently is that being yourself actually brings out the Star in you, it stands you out of the crowd and obviously you'll be different. (you'll sometimes be called Weird too *covers face)

my friend thinks i'm weird

My point is you've got to be yourself and enjoy the real you. *Please don't get my saying "you need some level weirdness" to be something that scare people oo lols

like our friend here

or like these guys

*looool.... don't mind me. I'm sure they were trying to be different or do their own thing but they got it so wrong.

Being yourself is as good as seeing yourself as Beautiful in and out, whether you're slim (not anorexic oo, you will need to work on that), Bold and Beautiful (not fat and obese, you will need to work on that too, its not healthy), tall, short, fair, black, Oyinbo(not the bleached skin) whichever way you are, trust me you're the best there is of you. Rather than trying to be someone else, make yourself better.

Take your fashion style for instance (i love fashion and style), is a way of showing your inner beauty. Your style attracts the Right people to you, it portrays the real You you want people to see and in my case (i'm special) it makes me happy. 

I'm sure a lot of people will be thinking "oh i have to start shopping" or "oh its too expensive to the stylish" or "please my own is sha to cover my nudity", my answer is being stylish is not expensive rather it requires Creativity ( a touch of you) and two(2) style is a reflection of who you are.

You need not to start thinking of following trend to be stylish and be you (but you can if you know how to) style is not so difficult, its being (My advice);

1. Clean- wear clean cloths and undies, ironed clothes but not all attires require ironing 

2. Personal Hygiene- Neat hair cut, neat hair styles for the ladies(not the overdue styles) , proper manicured and pedicured nails (gosh some guys are guilty of this) and shave the "shaveables" lols

3. Dress appropriately- wear clothes and undies that fits (not undersized or oversized), wear what suits occasions, avoid color riot that can cause "color blindness" (and other trends that can cause havoc) lol

"sexy aint trashy"

more like it

4.Wear your own statement- don't be someone else, "style is creativity, create your own"

don't be like this Rihanna wannabe

5. Smell nice- most importantly smell good, even if you can't afford statement perfumes, use affordable body spray and after shave *for the guys (a nice smell attracts too)

6. "Shop according to your pocket"- it also doesn't mean to buy cheap "aba popular items". Buy lasting and quality pieces that stand the test of trends.

7. Accessorize properly- don't overwhelm yourself with blings "less is more"

8. Wear appropriate make-up 

*helll NO

9. Wear a smile- you biggest makeup and accessory 

Gosh! i have so much to say but lemme end here(part2) by saying your style is an outward reflection of who you are and you wouldn't want to create a wrong impression of who you are. Its also just one my tips to "being your own celeb".

Till my next post (i'll also be sharing how being someone else can negatively affect you)  ....... enjoy the weekend

Odaabo, Kachifo nu, saigobe *hope i got the spelling right, you know what i mean sha, lols

See ya

Olufunke

Be your own Celeb.

Hello friends,

Hope the week seem smooth so far(though its just Wednesday), mine has been quiet interesting. So this lovely Wednesday, everyone is a "Celebrity" *yayyyy

Did a little questioning, Who is a Celebrity?
And Oxford Dictionary described "A celebrity as a Famous person in entertainment or sport";

Tiwa Savage

but according to Your's truly *takes a bow*, everyone is a "Celebrity". Everyone deserves to be celebrated, recognized, appreciated and ....... *fill in the blank* for one thing or the other, simple!
Its unfortunate the way the status "celebrity" is now coveted in Nigeria (and the World) and the morales these Celebs exhudes is quiet alarming and as far as i'm concerned not so good. But after a long thought process, i told myself, I should also be celebrated. Why?
I'm one of a kind and there can only be one unique ME.

*i lie?

If for the singular fact that my finger and tongue print don't match with anyone else makes me unique. I talk my own way, dress my own way, own my own dreams and above all "i'm wonderfully and fearfully made" says The Almighty God. *blushes.

Seriously, i've truly had enough of "i want to be like this..." i want to have a nose like that..." why can't other people be like me too. I remember a long time ago (story story.. story!), i so wanted to be like someone whose name i won't mention. I didn't like the way i looked, my height, my body size and so on.  I wasn't happy and i couldn't really be myself infact there were days i would look at myself and cry, those days weren't funny, seriously! Friends called me different names (OMG they are so horrible i don't want to mention them), made fun of me and it really did't help my self esteem i must say. Long story short, my "redemption"came through the day my mum told me of Psalm 139 verse 14 *please read* and fortunately for me it coincided with the day Agbani Darego was crowned the first black Miss World. That day my mum caught me crying, she asked just one question, "so what position did you hold in your last exams compared to the position of the people making jest of you held"? *that's the people calling me names. I blabbed for a while and wiped my face. By night i watched the Miss World crowned Miss Agbani Darego, i cried so much you'd think i won the crown.

I guess the point she was trying to make simply was that my beauty at that time should not be judged by what peers said of me but what i see and believe within me. From that point till date i became free to be Me and Love Me. Though i'm a success story in the making, the process has been rough but trust me it has been worth it.

So  back to my point, everyone should be celebrated and we shouldn't make some people seem the almighty Celebrity and in turn get less than what we deserve or even feel so intimated to start chasing how to be like them.

 It was a gradual process to get here though the journey still continues (and i'm not even close) but i'm way better than who i was and i believe "a Celebrity" lies in everyone waiting for the spotlight. 

This is just a preamble *feeling like a prof* please follow this page to get the full details of the journey so far. As always, hope you got one or two things from this post and please i do appreciate your comments and opinions, they are not just for me, someone, somewhere needs what you have to say to be a Celeb.

oya oya issokay..... lols. See you soon *plenty ((Hugs))

Photo Courtesy: Bella naija, Facebook, Google

Be a Friend to have a Friend (part2)

wow wow wow... i'm so overwhelmed with the replies, comments and encouragements as regards my previous posts. All your comments (and those directed to me personally) are all appreciated and i promise to always share more helpful tips as they've also helped me. So, "back to the matter" (in my bobo wizkid's voice) *continuation from my last post;

5. Have mutual respect.
Mutual respect is key in all relationships especially to maintain and sustain friendships. Like i usually tell people, "respect is reciprocal" because mutual respect is important, it should not be expected but given accordingly. Another twist to this is that, one must first of all have Self Respect "you can't get what you don't give.

Mariam Oremi OMV, Yemisi Oremi Olowo and Me

Its easy to say respect is only required when a party is older than the other but its almost not true all the time. Being a friend should not be determined by age, in fact if you look at age differences you wouldn't want to be friends with some people which can also make you lose the gains of being friends with them. Respect yourself, air your mind *when needed and know your boundaries. Shikena!

6. Effective communication.

This i had to learn by force by fire *lols. Most time, people assume a lot and almost everyone is guilty of this. We assume because we're friends with someone they should know us or know whatever we are thinking or have in mind, which could lead to a lot of unresolved misunderstanding. It's very important to communicate, which can be in various ways. Like me for example, i had to learn to talk and discuss my opinion rather than assume and keep things in my mind. Assumption breeds a lot of misunderstandings, fights and end of friendship. 

Find time to talk and discuss (especially during misunderstanding) as this makes the other person know your mindset and know you better.

Note- Please endeavor not raise your voice and communicate in the manner your friend will best understand to avoid *fight round two(2) lols.

7. Be quick to say- I'm sorry!, Thank you!.

It as simple as that. Don't wait for the other party to say those two words (as situation demands). Its very common among us ladies whenever issues or misunderstanding arises we always wait till it escalates or we wait till our friends say sorry. I personally think, no-one should wait to say either of those words as it doesn't show any sign of weakness like some people would think, rather it shows a high level of maturity and self respect.

In summary, i think having a friend and being a friend is the next best thing to happen to anyone after the family. They are the people that understand the real you, make you a better person (as you learn and develop each other), they are there always and they just have your back. 

I hope these few tips would at least be a starting point to achieve great friendship (and please ignore my typos if any *covers face). Lest i forget, I've got lots lots and lots of friends, different shapes, age and sizes *seriously for real! lols. 

Tayo My Oga, Temi small mummy, Niyi boo and Me

Dupe and Bola Bello *my runaway friend

Funmi and Adey *Amazing cousins

Mariam, Ada, Yours truly and Dolly P

awww Iceman and Temi *small dad and small mummy besties

Please feel free to share your own tips to "be a friend to have a friend'.

 I remain my humble self Olufunke. Do have a Friendship Fulfilling week. *muahhhh

Be a Friend to have a Friend

I noticed a lot of young people complain one way or the other of their "cliq" as bad friends, most especially the ladies. We have all in one way or the other made that "bad" friend that has shattered our trust and has also hurt us but guess what! all these can actually be avoided and you can have trustworthy friends.

Dupe and Funke 

For example- Dupe and I. 

Our story-  i've known Dupe for three(3)years now and i can tell you for free that it has been an extremely fun and sometimes an "unpleeeaaasureable"(had to stress that). Met her on my first day at my NYSC(PPA)/internship place *don't ask where* lolz

Duuduu is such a nice babe

She has a car, i don't. We stay close, she gives me a ride to and fro *how sweet shey. Anyway, long story short, Dupe is not the nicest person on a good day but she's still my friend.

 The question is, how did we get here or how did i conclude Dupe is my friend?- 

1. I never hid myself. 

I realized most young people are pressurized directly or indirectly to be accepted by our peers. We don't want to be the weirdo or the "unfun" person so we become who we are not, we PRETEND to like what they like and so on. Had to emphasis Pretend cos with pretence, we exhibit who we are not and what we are not.  At the end of the day, this brings disappointments and distrust from those friends and it hurts. *trust me it hurts real bad. Be accepted for who you are, not for what you have; those who like you will be stay and does who don't will obviously leave. (AKA sifting the wheat from the shaft). 

2. Take time to know the other person or people as the case may be.

Desola and I

Have known Desola since my university days at ACU (Ajayi Crowther University, Oyo) *don't mind me, i"m proud of my alma mata*. Anyway, Desola also is not a perfect person (which i don't expect) but it took me a long time to call that babe- Desola my friend. I didn't jump to conclude that because we hangout together and sometime share same interest meant i've found a friend in her. I took time to know her, watch her closely and often time, forgive her when she hurts me (*lolz as if i don't hurt her too).

3. Forgive and don't jump to conclusions.

As we get to know this other individual or persons, we tend to fight and have misunderstandings. Like a yoruba adage that says "oremeji tio ti ja, iro ni won pa fun rawon" -English translation- Two friends that have not had a fight are just fooling each other (hope i got the translation right). So, to make friends and be a friend, make room for misunderstandings and be ready to forgive and learn from it. CAUTION- please take enough time to cool off and think about the cause of the fight and have a re-think again if you still want to be friends with that person.

4. Create time for each other. 

Mind you when i say creating time for each other does not mean you forget your own time. 

Desola and I at one of our outings.

The importance of creating time for each other is to get to know this other person, learn and know their opinions and interests. Get to know the Real person in your friend. It can be difficult sometimes to create time especially when you are not students of same school if you're still students or it could be cos of work and other endeavors. It doesn't necessarily mean you have to go out on an expensive date and likes. Feel free to initiate an outing and make the time and venue convenient for the both(all) parties. (i like shopping with my friends, going to the cinemas or just a meal/gists somewhere).

Ok, Ok, i think i'm telling a lot of stories..... To be continued.

*Hope you find my posts interesting and helpful, please feel free to drop a  comment, opinions, thoughts and share the gospel according to Olufunke's way. Do have a lovely weekend.... kisses and hugs.....